Scoop's Life - Holiday Edition

Hey people! So I decided that maybe I should start writing more about my life, as in, what I do at certain points in time. This is something I always aimed to do when I first started a blog, because I’ve found a lot of other bloggers to almost seem...robotic. As in, they will talk about issues and reference themselves, but give no indication about their lives. I mean, come on. I’d want you guys to actually believe the personal things I say, not to think that I’ve add them in for effect and nothing else.

Originally I had thought of doing something like this on YouTube...but my confidence isn’t quite there yet. One day, perhaps, if I thought people would be interested in what I had to say.

Anyway, here comes a new line of posts: Scoop’s life. There will be absolutely no schedule for these; I’ll type them up when something noteworthy happens, or just when I want to give a little insight into my world that DOESN’T involve great personal truths and realisations. And is there really a better time to start it off than today, right now?

I should let you all know, I’m typing this at five past twelve on Saturday morning, but it won’t be posted until Saturday night at the earliest. Why? That would be because I am not at home right now. Where am I, I hear you ask? Well, my friends, I am currently in a hotel room, across the road from the beach.

Why am I in a hotel room across the road from the beach, I hear you ask? That would be because my extended family, who live a state away, came here for a holiday. We don’t live near the beach at all, so my parents decided to come down for the night. I decided to join, after much deliberation. I was nervous, see, very nervous, because the last time I came down here...I had a panic attack. A rather large one at that, probably the worst I’ve ever had.

So I was worried the same thing would happen. In fact, I had a panic attack while worrying about a panic attack (panic-ception!) and it got to the point of me having to beg my friend to talk to me to help calm me down, which I really hate doing (and if said friend is reading this - I really hate do it, trust me on that).

I’m panic free so far, but I did have a moment of rage that was very powerful. Let’s just say my family doesn’t cope well in large strange cities when we’re lost.

So I’m in this hotel room. I thought I’d be sharing with my parents, because we booked online as three adults. Well, imagine my surprise when they gave us the key to not one, but two rooms! Yes, I am in hotel room all on my lonesome. And I have to admit...it’s odd. I mean I’m typing this in the dark right now, because there’s no points to having lights on (and I’m hoping to make my eyes tired so I can sleep) and it’s just...odd. I mean, it’s a self-contained little room. I’ve got a fridge, bathroom, tv, my laptop...I have a balcony, air con...everything I would need to live a life, really. And it’s just odd, because for the first time, I see what it would be like if I moved out of home.

Now, I’m turning 22 this year, and by this stage in life, most are getting on with their lives. And by that I mean, they work and they're thinking of moving out of home...if they haven't already. I am not one of those people. I don't work, and I spent much of my time within my bedroom. 

I’ve now been in this hotel room alone for three hours now and its weirding me out. I mean, there are sounds from the street (they do NOT go to bed early here) and there’s a hum from the tv and fridge, but...I’m alone. This is what it would be like to live in an apartment alone. I don’t like it. One bit. In fact, even though it always annoyed me, I’m missing my father’s snoring!

Clearly, I’d be far better off with a roommate if I ever moved out. So, because the chances of me getting married are zilch, I’m going to live at home until I’m 40 like my uncle, or I’ve got to find a friend who would let me move in with them.

Someone just screamed something out in the night. It’s kind of creepy here. Me and strange new places just do not mix. See, I’m quite the paranoid person. That just makes thing so much more fun…when you’re in a new place…without your nice soft blanket…or your stuffed penguin to snuggle into.

Yes, I’m 22 and I have a huge stuffed penguin who I cuddle to sleep. Is that weird? I don’t think so, personally. Other people have animals and boyfriends/spouses, I have a penguin, which my dad has tried to name “Percy,” and then “Pin,” for some unknown reason.

I had Starbucks for the first time tonight. It was nice, but so much hotter than any place where I come from. The tip of my tongue is still tender. It was good though; nice and creamy. I now see why people like it so much. And I’m glad I did have that coffee because I very stupidly decided to have Rum and Coke with my dinner. I got carded, of course, before I was allowed to get it and I swear, there would have been like 70% Rum and 30% Coke in that thing, it was so unbelievably strong.

Ordering alcohol when you’re on medication isn’t exactly the best idea in the world, but where I come from its Coke with only a dash of Rum, not half a bottle. Plus, I needed something to take the edge off after getting lost and fighting with the family. The damn thing went straight to my head and I almost puked right then and there. My head still feels weird but it’s not as bad. Lesson learned here: stay away from the alcohol! I must have a low tolerance.

Tomorrow (or later today) we plan to go to the beach. I’m looking forward to that. I can’t swim, I’ve never been able to, but I love taking photos. I’ve already taken a few, but you can never have too many. Honestly, I could spend all my money and I would hold my photos to a higher esteem. Especially after my SD card went corrupt a few months ago, and my External hard drive not long after that, making me lose pretty much all photos from mid-2012 to now. To everyone reading: BACK UP YOUR PHOTOS!

Before I attempt to wrap this up, I just want to say something. I mentioned earlier about having panic attacks over whether or not I would have panic attacks down here. Last time I was here, last year, I did have a massive one. It was huge, it lasted for hours and I never, ever want to repeat it. The thing is with me, I fear what I can’t control. Anything to do with the future, I fear...and I also base current actions on previous ones. The thoughts went something like this: it rained the last time we went to the coast and I had a panic attack, it’s predicted rain this time and we’re going to the same place, therefore I will get another panic attack.

That’s what I focused on…the negative that happened. The fact that it would have been caused by the amount of people, the lights and heat from the shops...I should have been focusing on what happened the day after that panic attack. I woke up the next morning (I was with a group, we stayed over at someone’s house) feeling perfectly normal. I should have focused on the fact that no matter what, the bad feelings go. No matter what, resolution and relief will come. And I want you all to remember that if you’re going through some rough times.

If anyone would like to see the photos from my trip, I will be posting them on my tumblr, from tomorrow for the next week, which you can access by clicking here along with the tag “Scoops Coast Getaway” tag.